Monday, October 13, 2014

Of Land Yachts and Mid-life Crisis’



When I was in high school my brother in law bought a new model van for himself.  This baffled me greatly as they had not yet had any children.  I used to taunt him endlessly about the fact that he drove this huge vehicle designed for soccer moms and he didn't have any kids at all. Even now he still drives one; they only have 2 kids, though he does take the seats out and uses it for work.  When I first drove this van he wanted to know what I thought...I told him that it turned like a damn boat!  Thus we dubbed it a land yacht!


At the time I was driving a sports car, which I loved beyond reason.  There has not been a car since then that I have loved the way I loved that Mustang...I still mourn the loss of that car.  After having to drive that land yacht of his around I swore to myself that I would never, NEVER own one of those things.  That to me was the ultimate symbol of growing up and giving in.  I went to high school in Orange County, CA...in that area driving a minivan was a status symbol, all the yuppies had one.  That, above all else, was a status I never wanted to achieve, an abhorrent place in life to be.


My husband has driven Cougars, it's what his dad always brought him...since we have been married we have owned 3 of them.  And while only having 1 and 2 kids we were happy campers.  I remember going all sorts of places and sitting in parking lots breast feeding my kids in the back.  We made it work because that is what we had.  Around two years ago the last of our procured cars kicked it...and my husband borrowed his mom's car to get to work.  It is a small commuter car, but it does have 4 doors, and we discovered how great it was to have 2 more doors with 2 kids.


In April when we discovered this surprise pregnancy we knew that before the end of the year we would have to address the car problem that we had been so happily ignoring.  It was at this point where I knew that I was going to have to decide what vehicle to get.  I had always told myself that if it came to this point I would get a SUV...not a van.  I started researching them, and soon discovered that if you were able to find one with a 3rd row seat and a V6 engine, then the tires were unreasonably priced.  Being on a budget, engine size and tire cost were important factors given the cost of gas and tires right now.  And to retain my sanity, I was going to need that 3rd row seat.  As the searching progressed, I soon realized that I would have to start compromising and look at minivans.  Thus the depression/irritation/annoyance set in.  The realization of what I had to do hit me like a freight train and I wasn't happy about it.

I swallowed the very uncomfortable lump in my throat, started quelling the panic attacks, and searched for a minivan on craigslist.  We were able to get the money we needed to get 2 cars: a family vehicle and another commuter for my husband to get back and forth to work.  At this point in our lives we don't believe in going into debt for a car.  Anyway, with cash in hand I started the tedious process of finding a suitable van...and within a few weeks we found one and brought him home.


My son was angry because he wasn't bumblebee yellow and refused to ride in him.  My daughter was sure we bought it just for her because it was red and decided that his name would be Rodimus Prime.  My parents are delighted with it because now we don't have to climb into the back of the truck to go to church anymore.  And I have hung my head in defeat and stowed what was left of the small amount of pride I had under the back seat.

I have been driving Rodimus for over a week now, and though I am getting used to him, I am still working things out in my brain concerning how I feel about this.  I was sitting at a traffic light the other day after school had gotten out and realized that I had the same type of van sitting in front of me and behind me...each having stick figure families and a woman my age behind the wheel.  I fell into a depression and felt a deep sense of loss and wanted to be sitting in my mustang again with its V8, hatchback, and Van Halen blaring over the speakers.  I wanted to climb on top of that van and scream that I wasn't a yuppie, that I wasn't one of them!  I soon came to the understanding that it would be a futile act and that it wouldn't matter, that it doesn't matter anymore.  I slowly drove on fighting the depression and the urge to cry uncontrollably.


Rodimus and I are coming to accept one another as we are, but I have decided that if I have to drive a minivan then my minivan will reflect my personality.  My family will NOT be stick figures, it will be Super Mario!  I will play rock music until the speakers burst.  If I have to sit and wait in a line to pick up one or more kids then my van will damn well stand out as not being the soccer mom van!  I am going to make it very clear that I chose the van, not as a status symbol, but as a necessity.  Rodimus will become a reflection of our family and my personality.  I believe we both will be happier this way, and we will be able to grow together and learn to love each other.  Here’s to you Rodimus, may you serve us well for a long time!!

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